Advice for a First Date

A first date can include so many different emotions, usually all at once. You are nervous, excited, and anxious. Notice, I did not say relaxed, which is most likely the feeling that you want. There are so many things running through your mind “where are we going,” “what should I wear,” “should I offer to pay”? Eeeeek, so much to think through.

First thing first, to relieve some of that first date stress be sure to communicate with your date. Have a conversation about where you are going, what time did you want to meet, and if you are meeting at a location or driving together. Finding out all of this information will alleviate a significant amount of stress. While you are discussing the details, make sure that you have some say in when and where. For example, don’t agree to go to a seafood restaurant if you hate fish. It’s okay to say no and suggest somewhere else. This date is yours too, and you want it to be fun for the both of you. Below I share some ideas for first dates.

Once you have arranged all of the details, you will want to think of the next most important aspect, what you are going to wear. Yes, of course, your outfit is essential. Finding the what and where of your date should help give you an idea of what type of outfit to wear. Always dress for the occasion. If you are kayaking, you want to wear something that you can easily get in and out of a boat. For wine tasting during the day, you will want something a bit more dressy. If it’s coffee, then you probably don’t want to wear a cocktail dress. So think about what your plans are and find an outfit that is appropriate for the occasion.

The most traditional first date is dinner and drinks. So this is where the awkward question comes up “Should I pay, split the bill, or do nothing?” For this question, my response is to do what feels natural for you. You always want to be true to yourself on your date. If letting someone pay for you makes you uncomfortable, then don’t. If they pay, perhaps offer to buy drinks later. Communication is essential. Moments like these are always an uncomfortable time during the date, but if you just “do you,” it will turn out fine.

Now what if you both have a horrible time or just not jiving with each other, which let’s face it, this happens. All of our first dates will not be dreamy and romantic. So if the date is not going well, most likely the other person feels the same. Do not drag it out because you are worried about manners. When the activity comes to an end, thank them and be on your way. There is absolutely no reason to go somewhere else with them if you are miserable. Hopefully, it will all go smoothly.

If you are looking for some first date ideas:

Traditional: The most common first date is dinner and drinks (or maybe just dinner, but I like a good cocktail). During this date, the focus is always on each other, so there will be a lot of talking.
Outdoors: Go for a small hike or walk. A date like this is unconventional and will get you both active. It will also give you a lot of time to talk. Do not make the hike too difficult unless you know your partner can handle it. I would also suggest kayaking as a rad outdoors date. It could also be a very telling date as you need good communication to kayak.
Movies: Now I’m only suggesting a movie if the movie is at a drive in or in a showing at a park. This way you can potentially still have some conversation and have a picnic style atmosphere. Going to the movies is an odd first date because there is very little talking.
Art: A cool idea for a first date is an art after dark or some art showing. There are so many conversation topics that could be brought up on this date, so it should never be dull (unless you hate art). If you both appreciate the arts, this could be an exceptional date.

In this post, I’m highlighting more of a traditional first date look. I have a simple little slip dress that consists of very subtle colors, which I love. The muted pink combined with the black makes both colors stand out. A slip dress offers a look of femininity and sex appeal, without being too bold. I’ve paired the dress with simple black heeled sandals and a black clutch. If I wanted to tone this dress down to create a more casual look, I would add a denim or leather jacket. Below I am sharing a few more ideas for traditional date night attire. Now hopefully I was able to give you all a good little pep talk about first dates. Do you have any advice for first dates? If so, send me a comment on your experience and guidance.